Abstract Chatter


In the blink of an eye
April 17, 2015, 10:30 am
Filed under: Uncategorized

Screen Shot 2015-05-14 at 10.04.46 PMIt always takes me so long to write a blog entry. In recognizing this, I’m beginning early in an attempt to ensure that by May, I have some complete thoughts fleshed out.

I cannot believe that our little booboo is about to turn one. I used to look at other folks’ babies on Facebook and say, “it’s incredible how fast time flies.” When I’m sure in reality, behind those beautiful smiles –were sick and teething babies resulting in sleepless nights, tears, and endless tantrums.

So I ask myself how this happened? How did he turn one in the blink of an eye? 

There aren’t huge milestones or fascinating developments between one adult year to the next, and for that reason it can become hard to appreciate the wisdom and growth that one experiences. We take our growth for granted. But a baby’s first year puts it into perspective. All the glorious changes that occur when a newborn who’s barely able to open their hands –turns into an autonomous, little walking/toddling person.

He walks. He waves and claps. He smiles and shouts. He dances. He closes his eyes when he’s satisfied after putting 17 cinnamon apple-flavored puffs in his mouth at one time. He then spits it all out. Because, I mean, what ELSE would you do with that many puffs in your mouth. He is his truly his own person.

I couldn’t have imagined birthing such a beautiful human being– both inside and out. Most people still think that he’s a girl– but I just take that as a compliment because he’s just so darn cute m’A.

It boggles my mind how abstract this human being was during those 9 long months. And from this abstract being came this happy soul that seems to only bring joy in our lives. I wonder and ask what we did to deserve this. I remember only crying once out of frustration because the whole nursing concept was so new to both of us, and I was worried about his weight gain. But that wasn’t his fault.

He smiles at 12am when we wake him up from his sleep because he has a wet diaper. He smiles when he wakes up at 5am ready for the day. He smiles after he throws up. Even when he bites, he smiles. I can’t ever seem to be upset at him because he just laughs like biting his mama is the funnest game ever invented. I pray with every part of my being– that this snot-filled baby keeps smiling that contagious smile.

I suppose parents have a responsibility to take care of their kin. And that this obligation can sometimes feel like a burden. That it can be difficult and challenging. I imagined that this time and investment would be our social insurance for when we grow old. In hopes that he would care of us. And maybe even pray for us after our deaths. But never did I imagine that he’d already be our support system through this roller coaster of a life. It almost feels as if he’s taking care of us.

I used to pray so hard to have a healthy baby and delivery. I will continue to pray for his health and happiness. May he flourish and thrive– learn and grow. May he do good in this world. May he always have an open heart to Your world. May he always be under Your protection.

He has no idea about this adventure that we’re about to embark on. But how excited am I to take this journey together.

Everything is ceremony in the wild garden of childhood.- Pablo Neruda

May his childhood and everything beyond be forever blessed.